Whoa… never in my life did I think I would write a blog centered around my thoughts PERSONALLY.
Books are an easy way to escape for me. To explore in the ocean I’m afraid to dive into. To be a warrior fighting for a cause. To remember falling in love for the first time over and over again, or maybe even where to bury a dead body. In the end it allows us to disconnect from reality and live in something that feels much freer… less responsible.
2020 was a year of learning. I learned I COULD in fact paint something and work on DIY home things when I didn’t work 40-60 hrs a week.
I learned that I could eat healthy, and even use the Peloton bike that I promised my husband was worth it.
I learned that time had value… even more than I ever gave it credit.
I learned that slowing down and enjoying a Zac Efron movie marathon with your sister may forever be a favorite moment for me.
I learned audiobooks count as books too.
I learned the value of community.
I learned friendships can be found anywhere in the world.
But when 2021 hit, I realized I needed to find new ways to grow.
Being Healthy CAN Happen
The first was my health. For almost 8 years I’ve spent my life pretty miserable. Trying diets to change my life, getting sick, doctor and hospital visits, large weight gains and loses, migraines and a low immune system, severe body pain… You name it. I honestly just started to think I was born to be in pain… maybe everyone is, right?
With new discoveries I changed my life … especially how I ate and slowly when the brain fog ebbed, the constant pain and exhaustion becoming less each week and even losing weight I finally felt hopeful… hopeful that maybe turning 30 could be great. Hopeful that my happy place didn’t just have to be in my bed, but with friends smiling again.
I’ve found a new way to love food… vegan recipes, gluten free, dairy free… so many delicious ways to eat plant based (I know sounds gross right?) but I’m not kidding when I say it changed my life.
Would you be interested in recipes and fun health hacks? I’d love to hear from you.
Growing in Social Media
With all the time at home in 2020 I also became obsessed with growth. Friends and I would get so down on ourselves about losing followers, working so hard for a picture and getting little to no likes, and how great engagement groups were to help boost a post but it started to feel less authentic. Why are we liking posts we barely look at, or do we even like or support the content?
After a long day in the salon I would run home to find food and like the 200+ posts in hopes that I wouldn’t get called out for missing anyone.
So I made the decision to leave. I found that I valued my time with my husband more than I did obligatory groups. I found I enjoyed engaging authentically with friends I want to support and creators I vibe with more than before and instagram became fun again.
So yes.. the likes dropped… the engagement dropped.. the depression set in. But only for a moment.
If this is your sign to quit the engagement group, do it.
Follow who you want.
Support who you love.
And post what makes you happy. I promise the likes, comments and shares feel a lot better when you know they didn’t do it all because they HAD to.
Since dropping I have gained so much.
-over 1k followers
-more time to create what I love
-more time to actually read the books I want to talk about
-time to workout and feel good
-cooking… yes and good cooking
-have a conversation with people I care about
I always sit and laugh to myself when I hear people talk about social media. It’s either people say its Satan’s playground where the bullies go to play, or it has helped them in a positive way.
For me I can see both.
With covid being a thing, I noticed the slander, mean comments, roasting and canceling became much… louder.
Don’t get me wrong, I see a point to be heard and to speak up, that’s your right… but some were just to be cruel, because the screen protected the advocator somehow. They can just block you if they don’t like what you say.
My favorite… “You don’t like it? LEAVE!” (rolls eyes)
I have officially signed off Facebook as a hobby. Every time I decided to open the app and catch up on friends I found soooo much hate. Hate for businesses that were trying to survive. Hate for the postal guy who left your package at the wrong door instead of having some understanding that, you know, everyone is online shopping more and they are under staffed.
One sided conversations and opinions with no integrity or grace for others.
So… I said a good ole “bye Felicia.”
Twitter was the same… but more political… which is my least favorite of all the subjects.
So why did I choose to stay on instagram?
Instagram became a healthy thing for me. I found some of the best of friends.
Women that would uplift, encourage, and laugh with me instead of tear me down or find constant flaws in my actions.
People that made me feel creative, safe, beautiful, and seen… for me.
People who love to read, especially the nerdy weird books about vampires I was trash for.
I met strangers that became friends after monthly zooms where we laughed with wine and books.
To every person who chose to bring positivity, encouragement and love to my space. Thank you.
Because of you I felt better about eating different and less alone.
I felt stronger after a work out, because you took pictures and said “look me too!”
I felt less alone for crying over a book character that I know wasn’t real, but I loved anyways.
Every milestone I hit was shared and celebrated and made me feel like a queen.
I laid in bed and laughed over jokes no one else would find funny.
I even did a photoshoot on a horse in a glamorous robe because I knew my small gaggle of friends would empower me rather than judge how fat my leg looked or “why would you go take pictures of yourself?”
I would write everyone out who has changed my life, but for now I’ll just say you know who you are, I love you, and thank you for creating beauty in social media, helping a lost girl find confidence, and being genuinely beautiful souls… this one is for you.
If you need a friend to encourage you, to talk about books with, or to just drop by and chat about food. please know my DM’s are always open on my Instagram.
Today remember to be kind, compliments are free.
With All My Love & Gratitude,
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